Thursday, January 27, 2011

The Horse and His Boy Quotes

Picture by Suburbanbeatnik
"Narnia," answered the horse. "The happy land of Narnia-Narnia of the heathery mountains and the thymy downs, Narnia of the many rivers, the plashing glens, the mossy caverns and the deep forests ringing with the hammers of the Dwarfs. Oh the sweet air of Narnia! An hour's life there is better than a thousand years in Calormen."

"My Tarkaan is on his way North to the great city, to Tashbaan itself and the court of the Tisroc -"
"I say," put in Shasta in rather a shocked voice, "oughtn't you to say `May he live for ever'?"
"Why?" asked the Horse. "I'm a free Narnian. And why should I talk slaves' and fools' talk? I don't want him to live for ever, and I know that he's not going to live for ever whether I want him to or not."

I suppose, like all humans, you won't eat natural food like grass and oats." "I can't."
"Ever tried?" "Yes, I have. I can't get it down at all. You couldn't either if you were me."
"You're rum little creatures, you humans," remarked Bree.

"I mustn't be seen," "she said. "My father doesn't know I'm here. I'm running away."
"My dear, how perfectly thrilling," said Lasaraleen. "I'm dying to hear all about it. Darling, you're sitting on my dress. Do you mind? That's better. It is a new one. Do you like it? I got it at-" "Oh, Las, do be serious," said Aravis. "Where is my father?"
"Didn't you know?" said Lasaraleen. "He's here, of course. He came to town yesterday and is asking about you everywhere. And to think of you and me being here together and his not knowing anything about it! It's the funniest thing I ever heard."

"Phew! It's not much fun with the curtains drawn. I want to see people. There's no point in having a new dress on if one's got to go about shut up like this." "I hope no one heard you when you shouted out to me like that," said Aravis. "No, no, of course, darling," said Lasraleen absentmindedly. "But you haven't even told me yet what you think of the dress."

"And anyone I catch talking about this young lady will be first beaten to death and then burned alive and after that be kept on bread and water for six weeks. There."

"If you were not my father, O ever-living Tisroc, " said the Prince, grinding his teeth, "I should say that was the word of a coward." "And if you were not my son, O most inflammable Rabadash," replied his father, "your life would be short and your death slow when you had said it."

"Good-bye," said Aravis, "and I thought your dresses lovely. And I think your house is lovely too. I'm sure you'll have a lovely life-though it wouldn't suit me."

"Gallop, Bree, gallop. Remember you're a war horse."

"After all," said Shasta, "this road is bound to get to somewhere."

"Child," said the Voice, "I am telling you your story, not hers. I tell no one any story but his own." "Who are you?" asked Shasta. "Myself," said the Voice, very deep and low so that the earth shook: and again "Myself", loud and clear and gay: and then the third time "Myself", whispered so softly you could hardly hear it, and yet it seemed to come from all round you as if the leaves rustled with it.

Shasta was dreadfully frightened. But it suddenly came into his head "If you funk this, you'll funk every battle all your life. Now or never."

"By attacking our castle of Anvard in time of peace without defiance sent, you have proved yourself no knight, but a traitor, and one rather to be whipped by the hangman than to be suffered to cross swords with any person of honour."

"It is very true," said Edmund. "But even a traitor may mend. I have known one who did." And he looked very thoughtful.

Aravis also had many quarrels (and, I'm afraid, even fights) with Cor, but they always made it up again: so that years later, when they were grown up, they were so used to quarrelling and making it up again that they got married so as to go on doing it more conveniently.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Just Add Zombies

I see them everywhere. There's not one classic that hasn't been degraded into a pulp-fiction horror novel.
It all started with Pride & Prejudice & Zombies. And then he just had to come out with Sense & Sensibility & Sea Monsters.
And now everyone else is jumping on the bandwagon.
Why? What twisted mind decided it would be a good idea to take a classic love story and add zombies?
And if that's not enough, Mr. Darcy is now a vampire (according to Amanda Grange) and Jane Eyre is now Jane Slayre.
Emma and the Vampires.
Mansfield Park and Mummies.

Jane Austen must be rolling in her grave.

But no classic story is safe. Romeo and Juliet have become vampires. And Little Women? Apologies, I mean Little Vampire Women.
And now they've got their claws on history! Queen Victoria is actually a Demon Hunter.
They've even gotten hold of Abraham Lincoln. That's right: Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter.

I have a splendid idea: Let's take all of the most heartfelt books ever written and completely degrade them by adding blood, gore, and the undead.
Who needs a well-written novel when you've got zombies?

Authors of these books are simply unimaginative money-grubbers who can't come up with any good ideas of their own. So they take the classics and add the most meaningless drivel in order to earn a quick buck.

Pride & Prejudice & Zombies. Who'd have guessed?

Monday, January 17, 2011

The Return of...Frodo

Apparently, Elijah Wood is going to appear in The Hobbit.
Here's how:

Frodo will be reading Bilbo's account from The Red Book of Westmarch, and as he experiences the tale, so will we.
I hope that doesn't mean he's going to narrate for the entire movie. I simply can't stand narration. And as long as they do it subtly, it just might work.
Now, if this wasn't Peter Jackson, I'd be tearing out my hair and throwing a fit by now. But I have every confidence it his directing skills, so I'm not too concerned.

But there's other things to consider.
The Hobbit shouldn't be treated as a blow-off of The Lord of the Rings.
That means lines like "It's just a ring, what harm can it do?" and "Hobbits will never change the fate of Middle-Earth" should be discouraged.
All I'm saying is that The Hobbit should be an adventure in its own right.
When I'm siting in the theater, I want to watch The Hobbit, not The-Story-We-Never-Mentioned-in-The-Lord-of-the-Rings.

But I'm not worried. Much.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Wanted: Fresh Ideas

It's true.
Hollywood has officially run out of ideas.

All we can expect now are
remakes, sequels,
book-adaptations, fairy tales
and mindless action movies.

Gnomeo & Juliet?
Cowboys & Aliens?
The Smurfs?
Yogi Bear?
Are you kidding me?

They may be good.
They may even be great.
But, seriously, can we get some fresh ideas here?

And look--Even Michael BublĂ© agrees with me.↓


Friday, January 7, 2011

The Silver Chair Quotes

Picture by Elandain
"Pole, I say, are you good at believing things? I mean things that everyone would laugh at?" "I've never had the chance," said Jill, "but I think I would be."

If Jill had been more used to adventures, she might have doubted the Owl's word, but this never occurred to her: and in the exciting idea of a midnight escape she forgot her sleepiness.

"Oh come on, Pole, buck up," said Scrubb's voice. "After all, it is an adventure." "I'm sick of adventures," said Jill crossly.

"Please, we don't know your name," said Scrubb. "Puddleglum's my name. But it doesn't matter if you forget it. I can always tell you again."

"It's hardly what I call a Chance," said the Marsh-Wiggle. "But it's all the chance we're likely to get."

"Many have taken the ship at the pale arches," replied the Warden, "and-"
"Yes, I know," interrupted Puddleglum. "And few return to the sunlit lands. You needn't say it again. You are a chap of one idea, aren't you?"

"For those words are all that is left of a longer script, which in ancient times, as she well remembered, expressed this verse: Though under Earth and throneless now I be,/Yet, while I lived, all earth was under me."

"There's a stronger smell of danger and lies and magic and treason about this land than I've ever smelled before. We need to keep our eyes and ears open."

"I don't know rightly what you all mean by a world," he said, talking like a man who hasn't enough air. "But you can play that fiddle till your fingers drop off, and still you won't make me forget Narnia; and the whole Overworld too. We'll never see it again, I shouldn't wonder. You may have blotted it out and turned it dark like this, for all I know. Nothing more likely. But I know I was there once. I've seen the sky full of stars. I've seen the sun coming up out of the sea of a morning and sinking behind the mountains at night. And I've seen him up in the midday sky when I couldn't look at him for brightness."

A strong heat smote into their faces, mixed with a smell which was quite unlike any they had ever smelled. It was rich, sharp, exciting, and made you sneeze.

"And you must always remember there's one good thing about being trapped down here: It'll save funeral expenses."

Then Aslan roared so that the sun shook in the sky and thirty feet of the wall fell down before them. They looked through the gap, down into the school shrubbery and onto the roof of the gym, all under the same dull autumn sky which they had seen before their adventures began.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Don't Look Back

A wonderful video that uses the Bible story of Lot's wife to tell us to "look not behind", but forward.
Happy New Year!

Saturday, January 1, 2011

2010: A Year in Review

A Summary of Every Movie I Saw This Year and My Thoughts
How to Train Your Dragon: The absolute best movie of the year! How can something be so amazingly perfect? Every second of it was a flawless, breathtaking thrill ride. It's not just a fantastic animated movie, it's a fantastic movie. Period.
Karate Kid: This is one remake that can stand on its own feet. It had heart, wit, and nerve-racking moments that had me on the edge of my seat. As a plus, I cried. Karate Kid was how movies are supposed to be made.
Toy Story 3: Unpredictable and hilarious, it was the perfect ending to Pixar's Toy Story trilogy. Fantastic fun.
Tangled: Cute, spunky, and downright lovable, this was the best Disney movie in decades. Another tear-jerker.
Alice in Wonderland: It was the typical, strange Tim Burton fare (I'm not a big fan), but there were light-hearted moments and most of it was rather well-done.
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1: I was actually disappointed with this. Sure, the special effects and action-scenes were top-notch, but the lack of plot, humour and heart didn't help. It was dark and there were sensual moments that I didn't appreciate.
Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief: It reminded me why I never read the books. It was fun and magical, but lacked too much in the way of acting and story-line.
Letters to Juliet: It was sweet and cute (albeit unrealistic), but I'm not much for chick-flicks.
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time: Another disapointment. It was 'cool', and though the plot wasn't horrendous, the ending irked me. Another downside was how predictable it was.
Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'hoole: Note to self--If you're not a fan of the books, chances are you won't be a fan of the movie. The animation was amazing. Everything else wasn't.

Iconic Movie Moments of 2010:
Forbidden Friendship
The lanterns and The Smolder
I have a feeling that 'Spanish Buzz' is going to go down in history...
Tea party; "Have you any idea why a raven is like a writing desk?"
Karate kick
Seven Harry Potters = Seven world phenomenons
When Claire is reunited with Lorenzo

What were your favorite movies this year?